That’s right. I have vowed to no longer be the friendly ATM or the interim loan officer. I’m done. And here’s why: My experience has shown me that there are three types of borrowers.
Borrower #1 is the person who says they will pay you back and actually does.
Borrower #2 is the person who has the best intentions of paying you back, but runs into struggles along the way. However, they do pay…eventually.
Borrower #3 is the person who says they will pay you back, but they know they never will (and you learn a life lesson in the process).
After experiencing Borrower #2 and #3 once too many times, I have made some new rules:
Rule #1 When I have the money, and someone needs to borrow some, I will give what I can.
Rule #2 The money I give may not be the total sum the person is asking for. However, the amount will be more than what they have, and they can find someone else to borrow the remainder.
Rule #3 When I do give the money, I won’t expect it in return.
Why do I have these rules?
Because I have set the same expectations of others that I have placed on myself and it has driven me crazy. I’ve learned from my experiences that it is not fair to me, nor is it fair to others when I place the same set of standards on them, as I do on myself. I’ve learned that their values are not mine. The same high bar that I set for myself is just that — my bar. No one owes me anything. But, I owe myself everything. Whatever it takes for me to adjust my own attitude and my thoughts is what I will do to avoid getting myself annoyed at people who do not follow through on their word.
I have the power. I will not release it to someone else again, especially over money. They say money is power, but I say people are more powerful. What we tell ourselves about ourselves is power. How we choose to view things can give us power. How we choose to react to situations that annoy us gives us the power, as well. So here is the power I have given myself when it comes to someone borrowing from me. I choose to give and not to lend.
So, no more rants. No more complaints. No more aggravations. It’s simple. I expect nothing in return. And no one will ever owe me money again. I can live with that!